Saturday, May 31, 2008

Short Ugly People Getting Lucky In Sex

My blog has been discovered by someone in New Zealand who had googled the rather nifty little phrase above. I don't know whether to laugh, cry or nod knowingly in a Joey Tribbiani thinking about breasts kind of way.

Was it a slightly perverted Kiwi looking for some dwarf porn? Was he trying to find a dating site for himself and ever so slightly lacking in confidence?

Is it a reflection on me, or on my blog?

I'm hardly up there with my head in the clouds in terms of height, I doubt whether Will Smith wakes up in the middle of the night worried that he's not as good looking as me. But then again I'm no Joey in terms of "getting lucky in sex" either. I suppose it's fair to say I'm no Chandler even. Though it would be fair to say that Janice gets my vote as the best side character of all time.

These are the things that go through my head at 3.26 AM on a Saturday morning. The sleep cycle in Rhythmic Towers has gone AWOL, mostly because of my eye. I'm lying here, for all the world looking like a one eyed fly, big plastic patch taped over my left eye and I'm as sleepy as an eight year old on Christmas eve.

I know from experience that the average eight year old wouldn't have just polished off the remainder of the tub of lemon sorbet (with Sicilian lemon pieces). What is it about sorbet? It's nice and it tastes good but it really is ice cream with all the fun taken out of it isn't it?

Oh well, think I'll try sleep again. Failing that there's my engrossing book that I'm reading, all through the right eye. It's about India, Mumbai specifically and every time I open a page and read about two words it pulls me into its world. Spine tingling metaphors, sensual similes and all other herbs and spices come at me at about twice the speed of Sri Lankan inflation.

And, motivated by Cerno's recent Abba post I've now got the Swedish beauties on in the background. Agnetha and Anna Frid are kicking out the lyrics to "Head over Heels" in those slightly sexy Swedish semi tones. I'm an unashamed Abba fan and have been since as long as I can remember. We've now moved on to "When I kissed the teacher". One of the beauties of Abba lyrics is the way they got the English just ever so slightly wrong, perhaps translating literally from Swedish, maybe just trying to make things rhyme, I know not, but it's a fantastic Abba characteristic.

" I was in THE seventh heaven when I kissed the teacher" - Where did that "The" come from?

Good weekend all. I leave you as I listen to "head over heels"

Those harmonies get me everytime!


Gallicissa said...

ha...ha...that is a funny keyword!
For the the first time, had one ending up in my blog searching 'sex in sri lanka' - following my brief insights into dragonfly sex.

eLhamza said...

That guy should have keyed in "I need girls on bread!" (Joey Tribbiani) lol.

I recall in season one,episode 6 where Phoebe says the following to Chandler,

"oh oh,but you know you always see this really beautiful women with this really nothing guys,you can be one of those guys."

keep blogging

Anonymous said...

well you're certainly getting lucky in sex.. these days

INDYANA said...

OH ABBA!! :)



Rhythmic Diaspora said...

Indyana - The book's called "Shantaram" and is by Gregory David Roberts. I'm immersed in it at the moment, would recommend it highly.

The eye is healing rapidly and doing well thanks. Hope your holiday was good.

Dinidu de Alwis said...

Does the eye help? In getting lucky? Like, Get-Well sex???

I get sex related keywords all the time, but this one is kinda funny. And as you said, it may be a god-sent reflection of yourself... :)

Rhythmic Diaspora said...

Anonymous - I've always been a firm believer of that old saying "The harder I practice the luckier I get"

Anonymous said...

I ve heard its not always that hard

Rhythmic Diaspora said...

Dinidu - Nope, it doesn't!

Anon - Are you aka sarongtroubleshooter?

Anonymous said...

no RD i am not... someone WAY sexier...that you may already have met.

Scrumpulicious said...

Shantaram is an amazing book by the way! Totally unrelated to your post - sorry! :)