I love you so much I can't shit properly.

And some other songs:

She feels like a new man tonight

How can I miss you when you won't go away?

My wife ran off with my best friend and I sure do miss him

I used to kiss her on the lips but now it's all over

Forget the night, help me make it through the door

If you really loved me you'd have married someone else

I'm so miserable without you it's like having you here

Apparently some of them are real songs!