Monday, April 21, 2008

The Evil Child

By now K, my eleven going on eighteen year old, is reasonably well known to you. You've heard about her antics, her liking for My Chemical Romance and similar and you know all about her advanced negotiating skills. As do I.

You'd think that I'd be ready for her to pounce at any time. A bit like Kato against Clousseau, that I'd lie in hiding in a permanent state of alert in case she attacks. That I'd be be ready for her to metaphorically jump out of a cupboard and Karate chop my head off. In fact in many ways I wish I was ready, but that would take away the element of suprise, which is fun in an "oh God what's she done now?" sort of way.

Picture the situation. I was chilling at home, having bought some new jeans and a couple of polo shirts in Kingston. In a slightly girly way I was apprehensive about buying the polo shirts but they were from Gap and the little bit of writing made me err on the side of spending the money. It said:

"Made in Sri Lanka"

I'm weak like that.

So I'd got home and was looking at the blog, publishing a few comments and browsing through some new books I'd bought. For a while I've had a Mac version of MS Office on my Macbook but haven't installed the MSN Messenger part of it. I bought the software to use Excel and Word and it came with an MSN thing. I've no real desire to begin my MSNing but there is one motivator.

K spends a lot of time on it, as do most of her friends. For some reason A, the thirteen year old, isn't that interested but K is to be seen most nights chatting away to her heart's content. Her Mother and I both try to police this activity as much as possible but it's an ongoing battle to decide where to draw the line between security and letting them do what all their friends do. A battle that I'm sure other parents have all the time, just ask Dinidu's Mum.

I know that joining up won't help a huge amount but I had thought that I'd sign up to MSN and make K a friend, so I could have a bit of an eye on what she's talking about, without prying too much. Sunday afternoon with a bit of spare time saw me installing MSN, staring at my Macbook and wondering what the fuck was going on, a normal occurrence when I install anything on anything.

Then, once the installation was done, I attempted to make K a friend, my only one. I quickly found out that this wasn't as simple as I had hoped. It involved some kind of email going in her direction and me asking her for friendship. You can imagine my trepidation. Putting K in a position of power is asking for trouble. A bit like putting your brother in charge of defence, you know it's going to cause problems but you just don't know the exact nature of them.

Well my problems came back to me within half an hour in the form of this email:

Dearest Father,

I am afraid I declined you on msn I told you I wouldn't accept you so I haven't! Mwuhahaha

Well I accepted then deleted you... Bye Bye

From

Evil Child x

There was a smiley in there somewhere but it hasn't come out when I copied and pasted.

Need I say more?

17 comments:

chaarmax said...

She's got nerve I tell you.. Wise kiddo in deed. On the evil side, If you want a way in, why not try Darwin, I hear she's good with these kind of things. :)

Scrumpulicious said...

Lol - bless her! :)

Darwin said...

Lol! Thanks for the recommendation chaarmax:P

Well there are ways round it, but I wouldn't advise it as it would be too sneaky. Off the top of my head you could see if she leaves herself logged in and then add yourself as a friend on her account and then remove yourself from her list WITHOUT blocking yourself in the process (so you won't appear online on her list but she will appear online on yours).

Yes I will probably go to hell (if it exists) for these things someday!

bogzy said...

good 1 .. ha ha ha

Rhythmic Diaspora said...

Darwin - thanks for the tips, but she's added me now anyway. I'm sure there's more to come though!

Dili said...

Im impressed to the point of speechlessness. I fear for Daddy's safety :) he he

Java Jones said...

Some of those exchanges that are due between you two are bound to be 'interesting', to say the least! And it would be fun to see who outwits who!!

sach said...

hilarious.."A bit like putting your brother in charge of defence, you know it's going to cause problems but you just don't know the exact nature of them."

T said...

hahaha i love her!!

Jane Doe said...

I love her too.. and my dad still tries to stalk me online... thank god for privacy settings on facebook is all I can say... :) and he isn't too aware of the whole blogging thing, thankfully...

Charmed said...

K is awesome, Id watch ma back if I were you!!!
My Moms been trying the same thing you have for as long as I can remember!
Like jane doe said thank god for privacy settings on FB...I foolishly did tell her about my blog,I hope she isn't googling it right now!!

Anonymous said...

Well RD I can see my self in your shoes in a few years time... BTW how did you manage to get accepted ...What did you have to do an how much did it cost?

Lady divine said...

heh..that's a good one!!!
Wise kid too...
These days, kids are wiser and smarter i tell ya!

Bea said...

that made me smile, bless her!

Rhythmic Diaspora said...

My god, if any of you ever meet K, please do not reveal how well known she is. My life would be hell!

Confab said...

u better not introduce ur kids to us bloggers...poor A, she's gonna feel totally unloved by everyone, apart from theena and I who will probably gawk at her drummin

samanalee said...

hah! honestly, you should've seen that coming :-P

hilarious!