Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Who Gets Your Three Per Cent?

One of the things that I've realised since I started the blog, since I got a reader or two, is that people assume, understandably so, that they know you from reading your words. London, Lanka and drums is, I think, a decent reflection of me as a person. I tend to write about things that are going on in my life and how I see them, my "writing style" isn't a style, it's just the way I report life.

But I don't write everything about me in my blog. It's all true, but it's not the whole me. Recently I had one of those epiphany type of things when I started to think about the people who know me and how much of me they know.

You see, I think I'm actually a rather private person. The things I talk about here are sometimes deep but they're the things I'd chat to most people about. I've met chaps who instantly appear to bare their soul and innermost thoughts and feelings to every passing stranger. I'm not one of them. About sixty to seventy per cent of the real me is what I give away to most friends and acquaintances. It's not that I lie to them or try to put across a false image, just that I don't reveal that thirty to forty per cent of my thoughts to those people.

The next group is my close friends and many of my family. They have access to about eighty to ninety per cent of my mind. I don't tell them everything but those at the ninety per cent get close to knowing the real me, my more private thoughts and feelings. But there's usually a bit held back.

The top group, that elite band of Top Guns is my very best friends and my closest family members. Most of them have almost full access to my workings and feelings. But even they don't get it all. I reckon my closest confidantes get about ninety seven per cent of me. They know me better than anyone, they get to hear all my crappy stuff that no one else is interested in. They know the things that go on in my life and they are the people I care most for and who care for me.

But, that tiny little three per cent is very private. No one gets it. It stays inside and doesn't get revealed to anyone.

What about you?

Do you always keep something back or do you bare your soul to many?

Or is there one person who has access to your three per cent?


Anonymous said...

Nope, no one has access to my inner workings. Actually, it is more like 80% for me. The way I see - if no one can help me, then there is no point in baring my soul!

My life has turned upside down & I write them in my blog & only total aliens see it. I don’t link the site & I don’t tell anyone I know, about the site. Well………… my children know about it & have been bugging to know the name, so they can read the content.
I had to tell them, “Under no circumstances should you read it, even if you happen to accidentally see the name”. (When I am on it)

That sounds foreboding, I know, but the reasons for that stance stem from another perspective. I do not want them to see the extent of their mother’s misery & despair.

On a broader perspective, I do not bare my soul, because I do not want people to view me from what is going on in my personal life, as well as continually ‘ask’ about it every time we meet.

Anonymous said...

Hi London Drummyboy
I like reading your thoughts here. I keep almost 20 percent to myself. In the past I have shared my thoughts, doings and others with someone close but I realize recently not a great thing to do. Bottom line is you cant trust anyone except yourself. So I m going to increase that 20 to 60 now.. BTW im the same person who wanted to help you with your SARONG issue...my offer is still open lol. Takecare. have a nice day.

Java Jones said...

Watch out RD, yo let her help wit dat sarong and she be privy to anodder 0.0001%

Rhythmic Diaspora said...

anonymous - I hope that you get through your problems. I think that the biggest part in solving a problem is to actually diagnose it in the first place.

anonymous 2 - My opinion is different to yours'. I believe that some people can be trusted, just not all of them. Thanks again for your offer on the sarong issue. Should I become "available" I will be sure to let you know!

Java - Did you mean % or millimetres?

Anonymous said...

This is tricky... in order to put up percentages i think you need to know and understand yourself.. i dont believe many people do either....

RD you're lucky , you sound like a man who does.

I tend to be a pretty open person. Maybe one who doesnt truly understand herself, but certainly who shares what they understand with others. I thinks its sad that anon 2 i think doesnt trust other people. I believe if you have laid out your cards on the table of life, there are very few people you can really hurt you. There is no motive. It's all out there, for all to see.

I guess I probably share around 90% with most people, 95% with my nearest and dearest.. and the the remaining 5% is for someone who i feel safe with, to unlock and reveal, even to myself.

And Anon 3- "drummy boy" is mine , so hands off!

Rhythmic Diaspora said...

Wow - Some girls fighting over me! I had a dream about this once.

Anon 3 - How many people get that 5% of you?

N said...

ur sure they're girls mate?:)

I'm fairly outgoing but only about 4 people in the world know my inner workings...weirdly most of them aren't family...but I would say I keep around 10-15% of myself to myself...and that other voice in my head..

Anonymous said...

Rhythmic, we may not both be women! I would keep that sarong tightly fastened.. maybe that belt idea suggested once!

Two people get my 5%- the explorer, and the explored.

Anon 3