Wednesday, June 3, 2009

The Older I Get...

The harder it is to open things.

What the hell is it with these packaging designing people anyway?

Forget about opening safes and high security locks that even Walker, Texas Ranger, would have problems with, I'm talking about simple day to day things. Things like CDs, bottles of sauce and packets of sweets.

These days I fumble with them, looking for the enigmatic "tear off" bit, the one that's supposed to start everything off nicely and neatly, the golden chalice of the packaging world. Maybe, with the world economy crumbling into the state of oblivion they all tell us it is, these big companies have decided to survive by cutting back on "tear off" bits.

Once found, these "tear off" bits don't start a nice "domino effect" in undoing the outer packaging like they used to. They just break off in my hand and I end up holding a near invisible piece of cellophane while looking for an opening on the object of my desire.

Honestly it's becoming so bad that I can see why some chaps carry around a Swiss Army Knife. Invariably, after failing to open something with my hands, I resort to the aid of a knife to slice some part of the bottle/box/packet that was never designed to withstand knife pressure.

It's always successful, too successful, and I end up with sweets on the floor, a bottle with no lid or a broken CD case.

And I won't even start on the effect these things have on my nails....

17 comments:

Anonymous said...

Try wearing a pair of glasses. Its mostly the sight that makes you fumble.

Piss said...

Or you could die?

Makuluwo said...

The swiss army knife never fails, man. ;)

Just Chillin's Personal Blog said...

Sometimes what I do in situations like those is to stop wrestling with it, take a good look at the object and then start again :)

Rhythmic Diaspora said...

Anon - This could be a good idea. Where does one get these "glasses" things?

Makuluwo - Exactly, you see my point then!

Just Chillin' - I'll give your method a go too, thanks

Anonymous said...

RD, this is a problem that girl RD could relate to. Most girls cannot open things.
As men get older their female self begins to emerge. So this could be just a physical manifestation of the sisterhood. Just take a look at your blog roll. You do relate to females , like er LOT.

JP said...

digressing a bit. How old is your swiss knife? Mine is over twelve years

Sach said...

Actually this is one thing I'm totally impressed with in Japan.

Back in Paradise, this is indeed a pain in the ass, if you ask me. I have to sometimes use a knife to open a bottle of Jam. Sachet packets can never be opened with your hands. All that.

But here in Japan, everything - adn I mean EVERYTHING - has a proper way of opening. It's so easy. There's always a place marked, you only have to just follow the instructions.

Kalusudda said...

I used to carry a Swiss Army knife around but every time I fly, those security check guys take them away. So I do not have one on my key chain anymore. Yes opening stuff are getting harder!

ViceUnVersa said...

A guy walks through a jungle with a sack full of sweetmeats for his family. He falls asleep and a cobra enters the sack. So if he sticks around sooner or later he will open the sack for a snack and be bitten . If he goes home someone in his family will be bitten when they reach for a sweet.
He has no idea.
Someone should narrate this story to our anonymous friend. The internet is very similar to a sack with a snake in it, especially when you speak from your anus not your mouth.
GDMRD, enjoy the delights of Paris BTW. x to C.

David Blacker said...

I just used to get the ex to open it. She used to volunteer anyway after a few exasperated minutes of watching me fumble and swear.

Rhythmic Diaspora said...

JP - Good God Man! I don't actually own one. Although thinking about it, I did used to but haven't seen it since the divorce.

Sach - These Japs think of everything don't they!

KS - Yes, I'm glad I don't smoke anymore as I'd lose so many lighters for the same reason.

DD - Thank you! Off tomorrow morning. GM2U2

DB - It's an idea but I don't even know your ex so I don't think she'd be too happy if I asked her each time. And the distance might be awkward too.

T said...

ur ex got the swiss army knife?? why? we all know women are superior and can open everything.

Just Chillin's Personal Blog said...

You're welcome RD :) Try it and repeat... :)

Amila Salgado said...

Double-distilled the worse.

Anonymous said...

Age gracefully RD. Your real age is begining to show. Viagra can not always help. Age gracefully. Stop complaining !!

Electra said...

If you think opening stuff is hard over there, try doing it here in SL! Whatever said and done, stuff in Sri Lanka comes in the world's dumbest packaging. It's always hard to open, and more often than not, stuff inside needs to be transferred into something else altogether to be kept for a longish period of time.

You have to love the Americans for just this one thing. Their stuff is always so well packaged, easy to open and comes in packaging that is also designed to keep the stuff inside fresh for a long time after being opened.