Arse Washer

I've arrived.

Someone googled those words and was led to my arse wiping post.

Also I had the classic "Length of time for dead cat body to become stiff" the other day.

They fascinate and intrigue me. Was the arse washer perhaps looking for a job, or maybe a machine to do the job for him?

And why would anyone want to know how long it takes for a dead cat's body to become stiff? Well, apart from me a few weeks ago I suppose.

Other ones that have caused me to smile:

"Barefoot frog fetish" - Has someone got a fetish for frogs sold in Barefoot or is it a fetish for walking around barefoot in a sea of frogs? Either way it's something I'm uncomfortable with.

"Instructions for wiping your bum" - Leaps of logic and assumptions can be dangerous but I assume this person knew how to use the internet, how to type and how to search the net for certain things. But they searched for bum wiping instructions. Why?

"Medical help for men peeing on the bathroom floor" - My mind went into overdrive on this one. Was it an angry wife, totally frustrated with her husband peeing all over the floor when he was drunk one night? Was it the husband who had been so pissed that he had forgotten to lift up the toilet seat before peeing? Why did they end up here? I can't remember writing anything related to the subject at any time.

"Sexiest Sri Lankan lady" - A proud moment. To think that someone may have read my blog and taken my opinions into account before deciding on this high ranking position. I'm honoured and chuffed.