We were having a conversation at work. Neil, a chap who has worked for me for many years, whose real name is Nick, but I don't want to reveal it, said:
"I went to M&S yesterday and they had some really great offers on half price pants"
I stopped him in his prime, I had no choice, no option and certainly no interest. Salespeople are trained to show interest in things that they aren't interested in, man managers are trained to demonstrate interest in their team and what's going on in their lives, but there are limits. A chap can only be pushed so far before he breaks. I had been pushed to that point.
Sometimes I can tell, call it a sixth sense or blogger's intuition, but I just felt that this was going nowhere, at a serious rate of slowness. His opening line was a tiny clue too.
"Neil" I said, although I actually said "Nick".
"Yes Rhythmic"
"I genuinely don't want to be involved in this conversation."
"What do you mean?" he asked, with a wounded tone.
"It's a conversation about Marks and Spencer and how you got some cheap pants there."
"Yes but they're very good quality" he replied.
"I just don't feel old enough to have this conversation. It's not remotely interesting. I'm just not capable of it yet."
His pride was hurt, I could tell. I didn't care though.
Sometimes these fellows have to be told.
Now if it had been cheap drumsticks that would have been different.
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7 comments:
i think if you cared about him, you should listen to everything he talks about, otherwise surely you are controlling him.. and limiting his freedom of expression.
anonymous - I do care about him, I do listen to everything he talks about. I wasn't interested in M & S half price pants though. It's only soulmates who hang on each other's every word I think!
i dont think even soul mates do that.. one can be easily distracted.. by the passing of a blonde jogging outside a window, or the appearance of a new comment on a post, or the unexpected cadence of an earnest voice...
Anonymous - I agree on the distraction thing, but I have heard of, and even seen, these couples who continue to enjoy each other's company and conversation into their old age. They probably chat about nothing and everything in particular but still enjoy it. I call them "deckchair" couples. I even did a post about it a short while ago.
This chap, Neil, I would count as a friend but not so special that I'm interested in his M+S half price pants story. There are others who I would happily listen as they talk about absolute rubbish!
Just like reading your blog, in other words
There's such a thing as too much information, or subjects we feel uncomfortable with. I don't think asserting your feelings is either controlling or limiting anyone's freedom of expression. N was perfectly free to go find someone interested in M&S pants to chat with! It's not like you banned everyone in the office from discussing the subject of pants because you didn't like it, right?! That would be harsh and probably indicative of a personality disorder of sorts! ;)
PS - could anonymous = N??
anonymous - yeah ok then!
Jules - No, anonymous (the first one) is definitely not N. I agree on the "too much info" thing, I'm a sponge for information, some of it I even remember
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