Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Chocolate Biscuit Pudding and Fornication

After my brief foray into writing about important things I'm moving back to the trivial stuff you expect from me. Politics is fascinating and interesting but I think I'm better to leave it to the experts like Voice in Colombo. Until next time of course.

These serious issues aren't for me, in recent days I've felt like a rabbit in the headlights as I've been accused of all sorts of things, most of which are true. And, did you know this? I had to look up the word "foray" in the dictionary as I wasn't sure if if had one or two "R's". There isn't actually a single word in the dictionary that starts with the letters "forr", except "Forrest" but that's the name of the first premier of Western Australia, which doesn't count. I was slightly amazed by this.

And, whilst I'm on the subject of words beginning with "for", did you know that "fornication" is defined as "voluntary sexual intercourse outside marriage"? I had always thought it was just a term for sex. I live and learn.

Lady Luck, in her usual eloquent and witty manner, wrote a little post here about the perils and problems, the lack of imagination in the average South Asian dessert. Now I'm not a chap with a big sweet tooth and as one of my best friends always says

"a pudding is just a waste of stomach space"

Give me a plate of rice and curry or a good old full English any day over a tub of Haagen Daaz and some chocolate sauce, although the belgian chocolate flavour stuff is pretty fine. But I can still appreciate a nice British trifle or a good light French Chocolate Mousse, and fine French tarts are a particular favourite of mine. It's the accent I think.

Most European desserts are far less rich and less sweet than their Asian counterparts. A trifle served in England will certainly have about half the sugar content of a Sri Lankan one, only Sri Lankan hotels make a feature of a dessert section in their restaurant in which there is that vast array of multi coloured bouncy blancmange type of puddings which no one can identify. It's not important as they all taste the same, of sugar and fruit, or fruits.

There is one Sri Lankan dessert that takes the biscuit, a bit too literally.

That old Sri Lankan favourite.

Chocolate biscuit pudding.

What's the fuck is it all about? I don't mind the odd mouthful of the stuff but, unless you have some kind of deathwish, it doesn't make sense.

Chocolate biscuits are good, we all know that. I have heard stories of people who can only eat one chocolate biscuit at a time, unverified though. I would even go so far as saying that a dessert can be good, as I mentioned above. But, turning a packet of chocolate biscuits into a pudding just goes against the grain doesn't it?

I have a friend in Sri Lanka who can't cook anything, in all the years I have known him I have never witnessed him cook. Now I'm no expert myself but I can knock up a tin of baked beans or a fry up if pushed. But this chap proudly boasts that he can make a good chocolate biscuit pudding and people gaze at him with a sense of admiration. They look at him as if nothing else matters but his ability to knock up a respectable CBP.

Chocolate biscuit pudding is a sticky concoction that consists of chocolate biscuits (unsurprisingly), cream, sugar, anything sweet that can be found in the average Sri Lankan kitchen and then lots more sugar. The more refined palette can add some nuts to taste. There's probably some condensed milk chucked in for good measure too.

It exists because it can, a bit like one of those celebrities who are famous for being famous. Like that Hilton woman. It's the Michael Jackson of desserts isn't it. It's got mostly decent raw materials, talent and some qualities, but it's been mixed up together and made into the one of the most sickly things known to man, or child. Yet many people like it.

How on Earth did someone invent it and why?

These things puzzle me.


ddm said...

that is blasphemous!! a good CBP is heavenly, a bit of rum, not too much sugar, and darkish chocolate. you've been mislead RD, mislead into eating the wrong CBP. this must be rectified on your next visit.

L said...

Pineapple fluff....not very classy either but...yum.

Darwin said...

I have to agree with ddm on that one, a well made CBP is lovely.

SL sweets are hardly comparable in sugar content to Indian sweets. It's like they thought "hmmm how do we go from zero to fat in 60 seconds? Lets deep-fry it in ghee, dip it in honey and then roll it in sugar of course!"

Anonymous said...

There are no choc biscuits in choc biscuit pudding. it is Marie biscuits or rich tea biscuits in the UK, cocoa powder, butter and/or cream, milk and some sugar.

Dip the biscuits in the milk so that they are moist and line the dish with one layer of biscuits. Then cream the butter sugar and cream and cocoa powder and put a layer of the mix then add another layer of soggy biscuits then another layer of cream/butter/cocoa/ sugar mix and repeat. Put in the fridge

after an hour. serve a portion huddle up in your fave place with your fave book and read and eat and enjot!

Rhythmic Diaspora said...

ddm - ok, I'll be there next month and shall search some of the "hard stuff" out.

Darwin - Yes I agree, Indian sweets are just some kind of punishment really (sorry Indyana!)

anon - I didn't know that, but my principles still stand. The recipe sounds a bit similar to Lasagne with different ingredients. I'm wondering about a half lasagne and half CBP type of dish, rather like a traditional cornish pasty.

Indyana said...

Rd...You made me cry two bucketfuls of tears...mean!

N said...

Noooo!!! This is so blasphemous! CBP is the ultimate dessert if made right...only beaten by chocolate meringue...and yes there are no chocolate biscuits in CBP...though intermingling maliban choco biscuits with the marie has a nice effect:)

Niroshan said...

You have not tasted a good biscuit pudding! As anon said, it's Marie biscuits that go into the pudding and not chocolate biscuits. Add some raisins and cashew nuts to anon's recipe and it will be heavenly!

I had to comment on this because I am a big biscuit pudding fan and my wife and mother-in-law are both masters in making the original biscuit pudding.

T said...

gasp! a non CBP lover! this post just broke my heart. the RUM man, its all in the RUUUUUMMMM!!!

Java Jones said...

French tarts and fornication huh? Sounds like a good combination - better than the CBP

Ami said...

Forget the SL choc biscuit pudding. That is gross as you said. Well...you didn't use the exact word......
I used to make a mean choc biscuit pudding years ago with choc biscuits (of course) sandwiched with cream beaten light & fluffy & finishing with a sprinkling of grated chocolate.
It was to die for.
It is not as sickeningly sweet as the SL variety as the pure cream counter the sweet in the biscuit.
I added something to the cream tho when beating (brandy?)which I can't remember.

Lady divine said...

I generally love sweet stuff... and I must agree with Darwin on Indian treats being the sweetest.... and I like them too..:-)

Anonymous said...

Sacrilege!!! I read your blog while googling for a recipe for chocolate biscuit pudding. Firstly my dear man get the facts right. There are no chocolate biscuits in CBP. I would certainly admire any man who can make CBP. As good a cook as i am, i am not capable of making a great CBP. Hence the reason for googling for a recipe. Long live the great Sri Lankan Chocolate Biscuit Pudding!

Anonymous said...

Being out of Sri Lanka, hve been dying to taste a good Chocolate biscuit pudding.. Its not made out of chocolate biscuits! Its made of Marie biscuits(Sri Lankan brand)Obviously you have not tasted the REAL CBP, or else this article would not be in such a manner... Cheers !!