Chocolate Biscuit Pudding and Fornication

After my brief foray into writing about important things I'm moving back to the trivial stuff you expect from me. Politics is fascinating and interesting but I think I'm better to leave it to the experts like Voice in Colombo. Until next time of course.

These serious issues aren't for me, in recent days I've felt like a rabbit in the headlights as I've been accused of all sorts of things, most of which are true. And, did you know this? I had to look up the word "foray" in the dictionary as I wasn't sure if if had one or two "R's". There isn't actually a single word in the dictionary that starts with the letters "forr", except "Forrest" but that's the name of the first premier of Western Australia, which doesn't count. I was slightly amazed by this.

And, whilst I'm on the subject of words beginning with "for", did you know that "fornication" is defined as "voluntary sexual intercourse outside marriage"? I had always thought it was just a term for sex. I live and learn.

Lady Luck, in her usual eloquent and witty manner, wrote a little post here about the perils and problems, the lack of imagination in the average South Asian dessert. Now I'm not a chap with a big sweet tooth and as one of my best friends always says

"a pudding is just a waste of stomach space"

Give me a plate of rice and curry or a good old full English any day over a tub of Haagen Daaz and some chocolate sauce, although the belgian chocolate flavour stuff is pretty fine. But I can still appreciate a nice British trifle or a good light French Chocolate Mousse, and fine French tarts are a particular favourite of mine. It's the accent I think.

Most European desserts are far less rich and less sweet than their Asian counterparts. A trifle served in England will certainly have about half the sugar content of a Sri Lankan one, only Sri Lankan hotels make a feature of a dessert section in their restaurant in which there is that vast array of multi coloured bouncy blancmange type of puddings which no one can identify. It's not important as they all taste the same, of sugar and fruit, or fruits.

There is one Sri Lankan dessert that takes the biscuit, a bit too literally.

That old Sri Lankan favourite.

Chocolate biscuit pudding.

What's the fuck is it all about? I don't mind the odd mouthful of the stuff but, unless you have some kind of deathwish, it doesn't make sense.

Chocolate biscuits are good, we all know that. I have heard stories of people who can only eat one chocolate biscuit at a time, unverified though. I would even go so far as saying that a dessert can be good, as I mentioned above. But, turning a packet of chocolate biscuits into a pudding just goes against the grain doesn't it?

I have a friend in Sri Lanka who can't cook anything, in all the years I have known him I have never witnessed him cook. Now I'm no expert myself but I can knock up a tin of baked beans or a fry up if pushed. But this chap proudly boasts that he can make a good chocolate biscuit pudding and people gaze at him with a sense of admiration. They look at him as if nothing else matters but his ability to knock up a respectable CBP.

Chocolate biscuit pudding is a sticky concoction that consists of chocolate biscuits (unsurprisingly), cream, sugar, anything sweet that can be found in the average Sri Lankan kitchen and then lots more sugar. The more refined palette can add some nuts to taste. There's probably some condensed milk chucked in for good measure too.

It exists because it can, a bit like one of those celebrities who are famous for being famous. Like that Hilton woman. It's the Michael Jackson of desserts isn't it. It's got mostly decent raw materials, talent and some qualities, but it's been mixed up together and made into the one of the most sickly things known to man, or child. Yet many people like it.

How on Earth did someone invent it and why?

These things puzzle me.