The Sri Lankan Slipper Walk

Well, to tell you the truth it's not just a Lankan thing, I've noticed it just as much in Singapore, so it would probably be more accurate to call it the Asian Slipper Walk. But I've never been big on accuracy around here, so what the hell?

Feet are a big thing for me, though I don't actually have a big set of the things. I can reject a member of the female species because of bad looking feet. I wouldn't want you to think that I have queues of women waiting to have their feet checked before being allowed to approach me. Well, I probably would want you to think that, but it's rubbish. More that if a woman ever did approach me, one that wasn't wielding some sort of deadly weapon, her feet would be one of the first things I'd check out, very possibly a dealbreaker.

Over the years I have, on those rare moments when I ponder on things, thought that perhaps there is some sort of inferiority complex about women going on in my head and that is why I so often look at their feet. That however, is for another post at another time, if that's okay with you women.

Gait and posture are important to many of us in the way we view others. I continually work on my own as I have a tendency to slouch at the shoulders. I figure that it's because of the extra penile weight I'm burdened with, but I don't want to complain. Many of my days are filled with constant reminders to stand straight as I walk and use all the tricks I have read about to appear upright rather than look like some kind of walking snail.

On my flight the other day there was girl, a pink haired one no less, though I suspect it wasn't natural. She must have been in her mid twenties and was sitting about six seats away from me on my row. I found my eyes drawn to her and not because she was particularly attractive. I realised I was looking at her but couldn't figure out why. After some time it dawned on me. She had an air of total confidence about her persona. Every thing she did, from eating to changing channel, was done with a sense of confident panache.

She was no oil painting in herself but the way she acted and her body language actually made her appear much better looking than physical appearance alone could do. Interesting, I thought. A reminder of the way so many of us judge people by their demeanour before we even know them.

I digress, as usual. The thing is I was watching the way people walk in Singapore and so many of them reminded me of people in Lanka. Why? I asked myself. Then, like the tiny little mango jelly things that I really really like, it hit me. It's all because of slippers, flip flops or whatever you want to call them.

People who wear slippers regularly develop that lazy, digging their heels into the rubber walk. It's a unique gait and it's all slipper based, all about throwing the foot out in front of you and keeping the flip flop on. So, we kind of keep the toes angled skywards and the heel down, with the result that the whole foot barely lifts off the ground. As the foot comes forward the heel often drags on the ground slightly and the weight of the body is on the inside of the foot rather than the outside edge as it would. This helps to keep the big toe pointing upwards which in turn helps to keep a flip flop positioned correctly.

The result of this walk is that people look as if they're ambling with a sense of lazy nonchalence, as if they're swinging their legs out casually and strolling, in a Huggy Bear was originally a Sri Lankan sort of way. As if they're walking because they just like walking around, not because they're going somewhere. Stick a pair of shoes on and we walk with purpose, the weight falls on the outside of the foot and we don't subconsciously fear that a shoe will fly off at the next awkward bit of pavement, causing mayhem and traffic chaos.

And that, my sweet and precious reader, is the Sri Lankan Slipper Walk.