The frenetic frenzy of fabulous err, Sri Lankan blogging awards continues like one of Murali's finest, gathering pace and swerving all over the show with the only certainty being the fact that it will probably all end in tears. Maybe.
This morning we have the award for the best written blog, an award for which there are candidates galore. The Sri Lankan blogosphere is blessed with fellows and girls who write for a living who, as if they don't do enough of it in their day job, then go out and write their blog in their free time. Fucking weirdos if you ask me, but fucking weirdos who never fail to write interesting, poignant and poetic words and posts.
Would I want one of these creative types to write the copy for an advert for my Company? Hell no, but do I read their blogs and wish I had their gift for the written whatsername? Absofuckinglutely. Last year's winner was Java for his magical place and wonderful ruminations, but as he's already been a guest judge once we've got a newish one along, Mr Viceunversa himself.
I suppose there are some who'll think it's unfair that this award is based on the English language. Yes, it is unfair but I'll give you my two very good reasons. The first one is that I don't speak or read Sinhala or Tamil so the beauty of the written word in either of those languages would be lost on me.
The second is that, on both my computers, Sinhala and Tamil appear as little itsy bitsy noughts and crosses boards. This is a bummer, unless there's a Sinhala or Tamil blogger out there who is writing specifically about noughts and crosses, in which case I think the blog is fantastic and deserves an award anyway. Perhaps some kind of board game would be nice.
Let's get this show on the road and present the nominations:
1. Drama Queen / The Madcatwoman for Hissyfits. Ok. I'll tell you now that she's not going to win this or she'll get all big headed and boastful and I'll be accused of having favourites, even though she is one of my favourites. From now on I think she should be referred to as the award winning DQ. You know her and where to find her by now.
2. Sach for The Cynical One. She's a real journalist and writes real things, articles and the like. She talks us through her life, her adventures with a boyfriend and his weiner and her numerous piercings. There are serious bits in there too. When she's old and famous I'll stroll around saying things like "I knew her when she was young and famous."
3. Indi for Indi.ca. I have a lot of admiration for Mr Ca. He's developed a way of writing, on his blog at least, that is identifiably his way. Mistakes, he's made a few... It's a kind of outpouring of his mind onto the keyboard. If I did the same thing you'd just see a stream of swear words and nudey pictures but Indi does it in a way that makes the reader feel as if they've casually strolled into the inner workings of his brain and are looking at how his ideas and thoughts develop, rather than listening to the end result.
4. Brandon Ingram for the Black Lullaby. Brandon would be the runaway winner for the dodgiest hairstyle in the blogosphere if there was such an award but it's his blog that gets the attention today. I'm running out of metaphors, similes and superlatives, particularly ironic as this is the best written blog award, but this blog is another that takes us through the writer's trials, tribulations and journeys. You get the feeling that he's telling us everything, every detail of his life. He puts it across in poignant and poetic language and hardly ever uses really big words. He even uses Italian words, ones that aren't pasta dishes, every now and again.
5. David Blacker for the Blacklight Arrow. Not only has the man got more tattoos than Edinburgh, not only can he kill a herd of Elephants with one glance from a different continent, not only can he build an AK 47 from bits of coconut husk and a ball of string but he can also write a bit. Check out this post for an example of his ability, the writing ability not the gun making one. He lives with his parents too. I like that in a man.
So there we have the nominees.
I am pleased to announce that this year's best written blog award goes to.....
David Blacker for the Blacklight Arrow. With no time wasting I'll pass things over to DD for his words of nicety.
"The best written blog – the Blacklight Arrow – David Blackers Blog. He says "It's a blog. Stuff I wanna say. That's about it." Knowing this Blacker bloke well and loving him like one of my own I am surprised to see the rapid disappearance of his divine intentions of being gods gift to womankind. Through his writing, he displays rare compassion seen in a human, a passion for life, and most of all he's humble in the knowledge he writes well. A distinction rarely seen in Sri Lanka – Humbleness I mean.
I am also happy to add that I am proud of David's achievement. Among his many good characteristics, he is one man among very few to have in one's corner. A truly loyal friend who can rumble as well as anyone in the WWE, and shoot a Heckler Koch machine gun equally well or better than most blokes in MI6. Well-done Davy."
There's nothing much I can add, except to say that the speech is a little bit girly.
Many congratulations Mr Blacker.